My Inner Director

Woody Allen

I am walking down a Vancouver street with Woody Allen; he looks like he is in his forties. His wife and her two sons accompany him. I am telling him how much I like the process he uses to create his movies. (I once saw an interview where he described beginning with an inspiration that would usually come at night. He would write it down then capture ancillary ideas on separate sheets of paper. When he felt ready he would sit with the stack of sheets and review them waiting as the plot gradually came together.) He then asks me about my writing. I feel embarrassed reporting that since Life’s Little Book for Big Decisions twelve years earlier, I have written only blogs. He moves on to tell me he was here to do a presentation but only forty people had come. I responded that it was a shame I hadn’t known. He smiled and said that someone else only had four attendees. I suggested the promotion must have been inadequate and replied, “Well what does Kelowna know about promotion?” Then one of the boys observed, “mum have you noticed that Woody looks more and more like our dad.”

After I woke I realized that this dream was staying with me. Even without writing it down every scene and word seemed clear. It felt significant particularly because of the embarrassment I felt around my writing. I have written very little recently because I had nothing I felt like writing about. Perhaps it was time. I liked the idea of just flirting with ideas and recording them as opposed to leaping in to a project. Perhaps if I followed Woody’s model it would lead to some passion around something or other.

As I explored the dream more different pieces began to emerge. Woody Allen as the inner director of my conscious world. The comment of the children about his looks combined with his age caused me to wonder if this had meaning. My mid forties was when I was at my most dynamic and focused. Perhaps I need to bring some of that focus to my current life.

Shortly after I had the dream I attended a retreat at Ghost Ranch in New Mexico. To my delight one of the presentations was on interpreting dreams through art. I was introduced to a technique known as tissue paper collage. We began by visualizing the dream then spontaneously exercise tearing scraps of tissue paper and pasting them on a sheet. It was delightful bringing out the child in me. It was important not to plan or think the drawing out, just let it emerge.

tissue-paper-collage.jpgMuch as I liked the outcome, I could not at first see any connection to my dream. However on second glance two insights emerged. Where colours overlapped something magical happened. First I saw when red (representing passion) overlaid purple (representing the Spiritual) a deep beautiful crimson emerged. Also where blue (air or thinking) overlaid brown (earth or the sensate) there was another rich combination.

I felt these were important guides to how my inspiration to write may emerge.

Finally as I shared my insight with a small group I began to smile when I realized the simple meaning of the Kelowna reference – I always think of Kelowna as the interior because it is 500 km east of Vancouver in the interior of the province. Therefor the dream suggests that the inner world is not took good at promotion, it requires action in the manifest world to make things happen.

I began capturing ideas – a memoir, a legacy project, book of Soul Stories, my favourite poems, gratitude, my business life, my advertising stories, combining my 180 blogs …. It was fun – but then another dream.


I don’t like waking up to images of Donald Trump. In my dream he is cozying up with a good friend of mine. This friend is part of my dream library of characters. In life he is a master at getting things done, in my dream world he represents the dynamic masculine or the ability to do. In this dream I feel I am missing something, I wanted to explore a ship owned by a character called Alex. (I met Alex recently – she is a poet.)

I immediately realize that if I focus my actions on that which is shallow, meaningless, and inauthentic, I will miss out. It suggested I need to reorient my focus and as a result I have set time aside to write every day for even when I am not certain where to begin.






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